Happy New Year!

I'm in shock and disbelief that 2008 is already upon us. For me, 2007 was a spectacular year -- one of the best in my life -- so it's hard to bid it adieu. It was also the first year I fulfilled my New Year's resolution. Usually I just resolve to work out 6 times a week, moisturize more, etc., none of which ever lasts past MLK weekend. But, in 2007 I resolved to go to Africa (and, of course, to moisturize more -- Africa is very dry) and I went to Africa. Resolution resolved.

But I digress. After a lovely New Year's Eve dinner party at the Madoogans, combined with way too much champagne punch, I spent yesterday snuggled up on my couch, drifting in and out of consciousness. In between my moments of slumber, I watched the Law & Order marathon in bliss.

The marathon threw a bit of a wrinkle in my Law & Order Theorum, which is this: Whenever a famous person shows up on Law & Order, they usually are the murderer. (Note: This theory only applies to the regular L&O because, as my mom points out, famous people don't line up to play sex offenders on SVU.) The classic example is Laura Linney's 1994 appearance on L&O as a nightclub singer turned murderess. See, she wasn't as famous as she is now, but she was too talented just to be an extra. Thus, she must have been the murderer.

Time and time again, this proved to be the case, with minor exceptions to prove the rule. (For example, a pre-Alias/pre-Felicity Jennifer Garner showed up in the 1996 episode Aftershock to seduce fiercely married detective Ray Curtis. But there was no murder in that episode (apart from the execution of the criminal, or the vehicle death of ADA Claire Kincaid), just cheating.

Anyway, as I was watching the marathon I found numerous holes in my theory. First up was a 1993 episode with Lauren Ambrose (from Six Feet Under) where she played the daughter of the victim. But she wasn't the murderer. Just a daughter. So, maybe the theory doesn't apply to child actors. After all, you need good talent to play children, and it would be kind of depressing to have a child killer just because it's a good actor playing the role.

But then, I saw an episode later in the day that featured both Janeane Garofalo (post-Reality Bites) and Lauren Graham (in all her perky, pre-Gilmore Girls glory, trying to seduce Det. Curtis who had just recently been seduced by Jennifer Garner). Neither one of them was the murderer in that three-part episode! So, maybe the theory doesn't apply to three-part episodes. After all, you need good talent to sustain a three-episode story arc.

So that's where I am now -- my Law & Order theory has been seriously compromised and my skin is already under-moisturized. This is not necessarily a good place to start the New Year.